Tyrannosaurs Had Sex Too

Got a call from Dharma's principal. Let me remind you that she is in second grade now. I guess there was an incident during the writing portion of school today. The kids were to write a table of contents for a story they are working on. Dharma is writing her story on the Tyrannosaurus Rex, of course. What would a story be without a section on the mating and birthing process these giants went through? Only, she was very adamant about using the word sex. Which, of course, is not appropriate for a second grade public school audience.

I imagine her story was going to go something like this:

Ode to the beast of the all the Tyrannosaurs -

He caused tyranny everywhere he went
The giant, Tyrannosaurus Rex
He might still be around
If he had only had more sex

I feel as though I should send an apologetic email to her teacher.

Milker

Dharmas conversation went something like this:

"Sometimes, the baby cow hits the mommy cow in the milker. Like when the milk isn't coming out fast enough."

Pause as Mackenzie and I absorb the information.

"Because sometimes you just have to be hit in the milker."

So Mackenzie asks, "What's the human equivalent of a cow milker?" As if we didn't already know the answer.

Next thing i know Dharma is pulling the neck of her shirt down and has to be stopped.

The Milker? What on earth?

Dharma pulled her tooth out

So she pulled a tooth out today

Safety Violations

On our way home from the fireworks tonight we stopped at a park to let the kids play. After a while Nicky says, "Can we go?"

I asked why since it's strange that a kid would want to leave a park. Her reply was, "Dharma won't let us down the slide." I was about to ask Dharma why when Nicky continued, "she shut it down for safety violations."

"What? Violations?"

Nicky then said, "Loose bolts or something." I went over and sure enough Dharma was blocking the slide because she felt it was unsafe.

Sleepwalking?

So Dharma decided to sleep in the guest room tonight. Just now she comes stumbling out into the hallway grabbing the door frame. Then she looks at the frame on the outside of the door in the same spot as where she was grabbing on the inside of the door. I ask her two times what she's doing and both times she mumbles something incoherent.

Finally she looks at me, and with a British accent says, "I'm trying to find the button on the door."  I just look at her and say, "There is no button on the door."

She says, "Fine then, I won't push the button" and goes stumbling down the hall. I ask her what she's doing and tell her to go to bed. So she comes back and goes into her room.

She stops at the bed and says, in a British accent again, "I think I'll sleep in the guest room" and she goes back into the guest room, lays down, and goes right back to sleep.

Weird.

New friends over ice cream

The other day we walked to the ice cream parlor down by the river. On the way there I noticed a homeless man sitting by the river, having a beer (or a few), listening to music. It was a pretty warm night for May in Chicagoland. We walked by without thinking much of it. About a black past I went back and asked the man if we could get him some ice cream, too. He declined, but his friend who had joined him said he would take the ice cream if I did not mind - rainbow sherbet if they had it. I knew they wouldn't have that at this particular shop known for it's unique home made flavors, so I asked if there was anything he couldn't have and told them I would return.

We went and got our ice cream and walked back to the men. Dharma engaged them in conversation immediately. She told them her name and what flavor she picked out. She talked to them about a lot of small niceties. We gave the gentleman his ice cream (Lemon ice was the closest to shebet that they had) and we went on our way.

Dharma didn't ask about the men and so I didn't bring it up again. But I hope that these small experiences will stay with her and as she travels through her life she will continue to "Pay it Forward."

Next weekend we are going into Chicago and I am thinking of picking up a tradition I had with my older daughter, which had gone wayside in the last few years. I would purchase gift cards or bring extra sandwiches and she would give them to a few homeless people of her choosing - picking people that, for some reason, stuck out to her.

My kids are not perfect, and they are not always nice, but I am hoping that deep down I am raising girls who will continue to care about their communities as they grow older.

The Movies and the Cop

Dharma had a birthday party to go to tonight at the movie theater at the mall. It was supposed to be over at 7. At 7:15 the kids started coming out. Except Dharma. Then Mackenzie and I heard another kid say, "Did you see what dharma did?" And then they all started laughing.

At the same time Mackenzie and I looked at each other and said, "Oh God."

That's when the cops walked in.

Another minute passed before Dharma and the last few kids came out. I looked around for the cops to see if they were coming our way.

On our way out of the theater I asked Dharma about what she did that the other kids were talking. I guess she just got up at the end and was dancing making everyone laugh.

As we were walking out the cops were there. One was nice enough to turn the lights on and let Dharma take a picture by her car.

I don't imagine this will be the last time I assume cops nearby are there for Dharma.

She shares her birthday with...

Dharma asked me the other day what other things have happened on her birthday. I looked it up and found the following:

1837     Charles Goodyear received his first patent
1885     The Statur of Liberty arrived in New York City
1910     Lady Mosley died
1928     Amerlia Earhart began the flight (as a passenger) which made her the first woman to fly across the Atlantic
1950     Dr Richard Lawler performed the first kidney transplant in Chicago, IL
1963     The Supreme Court ruled against bible reading and prayer in public schools
1965     The Kinks arrived in NYC for their first US tour
1967     The first Chinese hydrogen bomb explodes
1970     Led Zeppelin began their last European tour
1988     Microsoft releases MS DOS 4.0

I wasn't sure what she was going to do with the information, but in true Dharma fashion, she promply turned to her sister, stuck out her tongue, and said "Na Na."



(information from brainyhistory.com and historyorb.com)